Da Hata Report

Chances are that if you have access to the Internet and a few friends, that you’re more than likely to be a member of one the most popular social networking websites of all time…. Facebook. This addictive website is the brainchild of Mark Zuckerberg and has actually changed the way that people communicate and share information in a virtual environment.

Photo: Mark Zuckerberg

Upon your introduction to the world of Facebook you’re amazed and excited about all of the ways you can re-connect with all of the people you’ve fallen out of touch. You also realize that there’s a lot of people who you’ve purposely forgotten or want to avoid. Once you’ve been assimilated you start checking messages, updating your status, reading Wall comments, and surfing your friends pages for updates as part of your daily routine.

Well I don’t know about you but I’ve developed strong feelings about how people are keeping in touch, sharing information, or just all up in everyone’s business. So I’ve decided to point out the Top 10 Things that I HATE about the people who frequent Facebook.

#10 – HOROSCOPES
Why should I be subjected to reading other peoples daily horoscopes when checking my time line? I’m not going to consort with the moon and the stars before interacting with a person. Your chances of having a factual daily reading is about as accurate as a fortune cookie slip. It’s full of crap and you’ll forget it anyway.

#9 – PRAYERS
God doesn’t have Facebook! Must you post your daily prayers to the Lord on FB everyday? Isn’t that something that you should do in private or in the pulpit? I’m just saying… all of a sudden everyone’s so openly spiritual and praying all over the place. These are the same people who are to embarrassed to say grace in public before eating a meal, but they’re real quick to post spiritual messages for their fake friends to read. Give me a break already. If that’s not how you are on the regular then save it Judas.

#8 – PHOTO SHOOTS FOR PROFILE PICS
The truth of the matter is that not everyone is photogenic. While there many not be a level of excellence when it comes to picking a perfect profile picture, some people go out of there way just to impress others. Come on son… why would you go out of your way with a professional photo shoot just so that they have a noteworthy profile picture up on Facebook. Um hello, how lame are you? If this isn’t who you are in your day-to-day life or during after hours activities, then why are you wasting good coin to front for your fake ass friend list? Nobody cares if you took your latest profile picture on the crapper or while giving birth. Just put something up and keep it moving.

#7 – BOOTY BEGGERS
Thanks to social networking people can now just beg for some booty over the Internet. Who needs the phone when you can just let the world know how desperate you really are by posting it over and over and over again? We get it, you’re lonely and on a hunt for some ass. I swear, if I could invent a virtual STD I would. Your fingers would swell up with crab baby hatch-lings and ooze out of your cuticles in a painful gooey mess that you couldn’t conceal. I bet that would get booty beggers to quit while they’re ahead.

#6 – FAKE ASS BIRTHDAY WISHES
Call me callous but every effin day it’s somebody’s damn birthday. Someone out there needs to be recognized that this is his/her special day by a bunch of people that they call friends. But let’s be honest here, most of those same people probably wouldn’t have remembered if it weren’t for the FB calendar. That’s right… I’m calling out all you phonies that wish people a Happy Birthday but wouldn’t give a damn if it weren’t for FB pointing it out. I don’t have the time or the energy to stay on top of birthday wishes. It’s not a part of my daily regimen and even if I see it… so what. That doesn’t mean that I have to go out of my way to be number 253 on your Wall wishing you the same damn thing. If you haven’t noticed, after a while the birthday girl or boy will change their status to address everyone in one shot…thank you.

#5 – SPY’S
If we’re not friends, it’s for a reason. Just because we’ve got friends in common doesn’t give you the right to start sharing my business with someone who’s not a friend. That’s when we’ve got a problem and you’ve crossed the line. In my eyes that’s instant grounds to be dismissed from my list. Just stay in your lane and everything will remain kosher.

#4 – STUPID GAME APPLICATIONS
I don’t want to play Cityville, Farmville, Cafe World, Mafia Wars, Sorority Life, or any other stupid game that keeps you losers addicted to the computer. If I’m not winning real money… save your requests and pointless status updates that clog up my time line.

#3 – STRANGER FRIEND REQUESTS
If I don’t know you, then why do you insist on requesting me? This isn’t MySpace and I’m not trying to up my friend count. If I really don’t know you, and we don’t have business in common, then why friend request me? Just because you think I’m incredibly sexy doesn’t mean that I’m trying to be your friend. You’d know that if you knew me so your request is denied!

#2 – BEEF
I can’t even being to tell you how many times people catch beef over what’s been said or exposed on Facebook. I think it has something to do with actually being able to see things with your own two eyes that sets people off. Facebook causes break-ups like a mother fucker. As the saying goes, “Don’t start none. Won’t be none”. The worst time to post a status update is when you’re in the heat of the moment. Those comments usually come back to haunt you, keep the drama going, or start new problems. I say just go all old school with it… pick up the effin phone or take it to the parking lot.

#1 – BLIND ITEMS
What’s the purpose of posting blind items in your status time line? If you’ve got the balls to put your feelings out there for your entire friend list to read, then at least have the balls to call out the person by name. Otherwise you’re just playing a game of hide and go seek with your comments and looking for attention for all the wrong reasons. You want everyone to know, but at the same time you don’t. So if that’s the case then just keep your emotional blind item comments to yourself. If you’re not going to say how you really feel about the person you’re beefin about, then don’t post comments about them in your status. That’s a move for suckas and jive turkeys!

And there you have it folks! The Top 10 Things that I HATE about the people who frequent Facebook.

~Dana Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan®

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Last year Lil Kim made it known to the world that she’s not feeling Nicki Minaj. You’re probably thinking to yourself that that’s because Minaji isn’t a real lyricist, but it’s actually more about the lack of respect and Minja’s undying ability to swagger jack Kim’s visual footprint.

Photo (Left to Right): Lil Kim, and Nicki Minaj

See it’s one thing to have been influenced by someone that you admired as a child, but it’s a totally different story when you’re trying to re-create the wheel in your own image. So Lil Kim’s not buggin out, but she’s desperately trying to school a younger audience and remind her fans of the bricks she’s laid.

Everyone, no matter who you are, has looked up to or admired someone in their lifetime. It’s only natural for new artist to take a little bit of this or that from the people who’ve helped to influence their style. For an established artist it’s an honor to see how your work has helped to mold the future. Which may have been the case in the beginning of Nicki Minaj’s journey, but that honor has somehow transformed into a really bad rebirth of “Single White Female” for Lil Kim. Minaj’s carbon copy antics have managed to completely piss off Lil Kim and she’s not afraid to be vocal about it!

The younger generation see’s Minaj as the new Lil Kim, and in their eyes Kim should just retire and let it go already. They didn’t grow up during the whole Notorious B.I.G. movement so they really don’t care about who did it first. To them it’s all about who’s doing it now and truth be told… it isn’t Lil Kim. So they’ve picked up the new Black Barbie and retired the original.

Not to mention that Raps New Hope, Drake co-signed on the matter by stating that Nicki Minaj “is the best woman in rap, period, forget what Lil Kim might say”. Which in my opinion is very pretentious on his behalf considering that he’s still a novice when it comes to the music game. Aubrey Graham you need to stop playing… your training wheels just came off and you don’t strike me as the type to condone swagger jacking… so hush!

Minaj appears to have followed the Lil Kim visual blueprint to a tee, and it’s the way that she and/or her camp went about it, that has Lil Kim with her panties in a bunch. Think about it… artists like Usher, Ne-Yo give thanks to Michael Jackson all the time for helping them to develop their style. Does Minaj give credit where credit is due? If she did, she probably won’t anymore because of Lil Kim’s open attacks on her; which in Kim’s mind are justified because Minaj’s carbon copy visual swagger jacking has falsely pushed her to the top.

Kim is not taking the situation lightly nor is she willing to be quiet about it. At first I was like yeah Kim, tell her how you feel. This is the world of Rap after all, and if Nicki wants to play an actor who’s using music as her vehicle then she’ll just have to deal with the beef.

In this game it’s only natural for a Rapper to forever immortalize their take on a situation by letting the public know. So Lil Kim took it to the media, and then to the streets with the release of her diss track “Black Friday” and mixtape. Lil Kim openly shit on Nicki Minaj by releasing her mixtape on the same day as Minaj released her debut album “Pink Friday” back in 2010.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH: BLACK FRIDAY

BUT the beef that Lil Kim is spewing has gone far beyond her age clearance and frankly it’s become pathetic. Why did she make a real music video for a diss track? Does she think that she’s Mariah Carey with her own version of “Obsessed”? Um, NEWSFLASH: Mariah actually placed her diss track about Eminem on her album and she continues to get commercial spins. Lil Kim put out a mixtape that only the underground listens to. So what was the point of making a video for it? I don’t even think BET’s given it any air play.

At this point you would assume that Kim’s made her position clear, but your wrong. Lil Kim continues on and has now released a freakin documentary basically pointing out Minaj’s swagger jacking antics. However, I can’t stop thinking that this should have come out in 2010 prior to the release of the “Black Friday”?

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH: SWAGGER JACKING IN PROGRESS

I feel like we’ve officially gone through all the stages of Lil Kim’s temper tantrum (I hope). After watching this video… there is no denying the visual swagger jacking that Nicki Minaj tried and did get away with. Until now that is! Lil Kim has officially called her out her Carbon Copy, and now you’ve seen it for yourself. Lil Kim has every right to be pissed the fuck off! Nicki, as a woman, needs to own up to this shit. I understand that she doesn’t want to drink pickle juice, but you can’t ignore the truth… and the bigger her celebrity grows so will her grassroots days of swagger jacking Lil Kim. So she better make good and own up to it. Otherwise she can best believe that Lil Kim will never let her live it down.

Now when it comes to Lil Kim vs. Nicki Minaj…

Kimmy hasn’t been able to re-capture her “Hardcore” audience since she became a plastic. Fans love the old Lil Kim and are more interested these days in her latest surgery rather than her lyrics. It’s no secret that Lil Kim needs the buzz of a beef in order to get back into the limelight. Hip-Hoppers are fickle and no matter how much they admire the classics of old-schoolers, Kim hasn’t been able to bounce back in years. Her career has taken a major hit and now she’s hoping to cash in on her Carbon Copies success by openly dissing her arch-nemesis.

Minaj has barely acknowledged the old woman’s claims and blatant proof of swagger jacking. However, it always appears as though she’s silently addressing the situation whenever she spits live to her chicken audience or let’s her alter ego Roman loose.

I have to say that what once was, no longer is. Minaj has branched out on her own and now has the ability to present her visual style anyway she wants to. Although Nicki may have obtained the attention of the music and entertainment industry off of the sweat of Lil Kim’s back, she’s certainly able to show and prove on her own merit.

While Kim’s beef parade may have garnered a little buzz, she’s clearly been dusted by Minaj’s success. Lil Kim is struggling to remain relevant even though she’s a better artist lyrically, and she’s hoping that if she can hate hard enough on her Carbon Copy minion, that people will take notice (in a good way). Maybe she’ll even earn her next big break… something bigger than a “Dancing with the Stars” come back.

As for Minaj, she’s not even thinking about her former idols childish motives. Nicki has already moved on to other things like being considered for Simon Cowell’s British import talent competition “The X Factor” as one of its star judges. Let’s just hope that she’ll study teen judge Lil Mama from “America’s Next Dance Crew” on what not to do. BECAUSE we certainly don’t need a carbon copy of that!

Final thoughts and advice:

Nicki you need to give props where pros is do, and apologize publicly to Lil Kim. Then ya’ll two bitches need to hug it out and go on tour! Money over everything right?

~Dana Da Da Designated Hata®
aka Nobody’s Fan®

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Hip-Hop losses Rapper/Singer, Nate Dogg, at the age of 41 from complications related to his previous strokes.

Nate Dogg trail-blazed a new sound for the West Coast by jumping on such legendary tracks as “Regulate” with Warren G, and “The Next Episode” with Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg. The music industry was hooked. Nate Dogg had a sound that resonated with audiences, and later went on to let the East coast get a taste of him in “Area Codes” with Ludacris, and “Shake That” with Eminem.

PRESS PLAY TO WATCH VIDEO:

Now I’m not gonna sit here and make it sound like we’ve been paying attention to Nate Dogg’s struggles. Hip-Hop forgot about this player because let’s face it… “It’s not about what you did then, but it’s all about what you’re doing now”. At least until you die anyway.

All of a sudden everybody and they mother is reminiscing on the good old days of Nate Dogg, but where were you on March 12th? You damn well that you weren’t even thinking about him or showing support. You say that I’m fucked up because I’m a realist, but you’re even more even fucked up because you didn’t become his biggest fan until March 15th when he was pronounced dead.

Did you even know that after Nate’s first stroke in 2007 that the Rapper/Singer was paralyzed on the left side of his body? What about that after he suffered a second stroke in 2008 that he’d been undergoing physical therapy in an attempt to return to some normality? Shocked by this news are you? Well if you should be. Not to worry though, I’m sure he’ll receive his tribute at the next installment of the Source Awards.

While I am one to kick dirt on you while you’re down, I’m not the type to talk shit about you after you’ve died without reason. So my prayers go out to the family… but to all you folks that only give a fuck because of his passing, you need to check yourself.

~Dana Da Designated Hata® aka Nobody’ Fan®

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Usually I wouldn’t stoop so low as to talk about a dog but I just couldn’t help myself when it came to this latest piece of Rich Folks Nonsense. When you think buying a dog, how much are you willing to spend for man’s best friend? A couple of hundred, a few thousand, or a couple of million?

Well this article really isn’t about the dog, it’s more about the self-righteous Chinese coal tycoon Yang who purchased the 11 month old red Tibetan Mastiff for a whopping $1.52 million dollars!

What the hell? Who spends that much money on a dog? If I was the Golden Goose I’d be pretty pissed off that this animal hasn’t done anything worthy of fetching such a price. Well at least not until he’s old enough to start getting paid for giving up the booty. That’s right, “Big Splash” which in Mandarin means “Hong Dong” will get an estimated $15,000 for an evening out with the ladies in hopes breeding some big fluffy man eaters of his own.

This puppy currently weighs in at 180 pounds and is said to grow to as large as 285 pounds by the time he’s an adult. That’s as big as an overweight human on all fours! This pooch probably won’t get invited to the dog park for playtime because he scare away the other dogs. And let’s not even think about the amount of food he consumes or what size scoop you would need for that poop. Yuck!

Even if I had the money to purchase a pet at this $1.52 million dollar price tag, I wouldn’t! IT’S A DOG PEOPLE!! They’re really nothing more than a pet, a wandering stranger on the street, or even dinner in some countries. I could care less if Genghis Khan or Buddha owned one… that doesn’t make the animal all holy. It simply means that they both owned one of these big ass dogs, and that this breed has been around for a really long time.

Photo: Owner, Yang of an 11-month-old red Tibetan mastiff “Big Splash/Hong Dong. Photo Credit: AP, China

Why walk around with a measly bling accessory if you can just purchase a life size fur ball? Owning the Tibetan Mastiff is the newest status symbol for the super wealthy at this point. I’m sure it doesn’t have anything to do with that fact that red is considered to be a lucky color in the Chinese culture, or that the Tibetan Mastiffs are thought to be holy animals, bringing riches and good health to their owners. In Yang’s case let’s just hope that Big Splash doesn’t go all Cujo on his ass, because I’m sure he’s learning the art of karate as we speak.

~Dana Da Designated Hata® aka Nobody’s Fan®

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Let’s start with the basics since many of you have forgotten the true definition of a housewife. The word HOUSEWIFE means: a married female who is not employed outside of the home that manages the household while her husband earns the family income.

While the female gender has advanced tremendously over the past 100 years… thank GOODNESS… that doesn’t mean that the definition of a word gets to evolve as well. If you’re gonna call yourself a housewife then you better understand what that word actually means. Otherwise you just look and sound like a stupid chicken.

Please understand that I’m not speaking to any unemployed spouses who are out of work because of the economy, or those women who are actually needed at home to take care of kids or a sick/elderly family member.

I’m talking to all those women who call themselves a housewife but who are more concerned about how they look, consumed by gossip, instigate cat fights with women who are not in their circle, and just have to be at the forefront of their local social scene. I’m talking to all you so called housewives who are allergic cleaning, and don’t know a thing about cooking other than popping a ready made meal into the oven. You know… the kind of woman that goes out to eat every night, has a personal chef to prepare everyday meals, or caters in all time because she’s so busy doing nothing.

Reality TV is trying its hardest to transform the true meaning of a housewife with its inaccurate use of the word. Rule #1: You can only be classified as a housewife if you’ve actually been married. Ex-Finance’s and Ex-Girlfriends/Baby Mammas don’t count. A woman can not be considered a wife she’s never completed the “ring on it” process. No marriage certificate equals… who are you?

VH1′s Basketball Wives – Season 2 / Pictured: (Row 1, L to R) Juli Richmond, Tami Roman, Shaunie O’Neal, Jennifer Williams, Royce Reed, Suzie Ketcham, (Row 2, L to R) Evelyn Lozada, and Kimberli Russell.

Take for example VH1′s “Basketball Wives”. Only three of the eight woman starring on this show are actually married. Two of those women are there more for support purposes with the occasional appearance. The other one, Jennifer “Red Carpet” Williams happens to be on the brink of divorce with former NBA player Eric Williams. The executive producer/cast member, Shaunie O’Neal is the ex-wife to Shaquille O’Neal…BUT it’s her show so she can be whatever, do whatever, and say whatever. Then we have the new comer Tami Roman whose the ex-wife of NBA player Kenny Anderson. The rest of the women… Evelyn Lozada, Suzie Ketcham, and Royce Reed are all non-ringed up individuals. They’re not “housewives”, but in fact ex-fiances or ex-girlfriends/baby mamas.

As to the ex-wives… I’m willing to give them a free pass when it comes to these shows. However they’re only able to avoid a fraction of ridicule because they were actually married at some point, and may very in fact still be living the life of a kept woman after the divorce. Offer is limited and not valid for all situations, see Da Hata for details.

The Realhousewives of Beverly Hills – Season 1 / Pictured: (L to R) Taylor Armstrong, Adrienne Maloof, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Camille Grammer, Kim Richards.

Part of me is hatin… SO WHAT. I’m a hata AND that’s what I do. I can’t stand going to the mall in the middle of the day and seeing all these “expense account housewives” out spending their spouse’s money like it’s a job. I go to eat lunch and there they are getting bent at the bar as a favorite pass time. They’ve got their little housewife clicks and they make sure to have grown up play dates in the middle of the day. I’m hatin because I got to go out and bust my ass day in and day out to earn a living! Nothing pisses me off more that having to spot a group of “expense account housewives” while I’m out on lunch. They’re just as happy as can be burning money that they didn’t lift a finger to earn. Wait… that’s just me being mean… I forgot that it’s hard work caring for the kids (if you’ve got any), catering to your man, looking pretty, and giving up the booty on demand!! [insert evil laugh here]

The Realhousewives of Atlanta – Season 3 / Pictured: (L to R) Phaedra Parks, Kim Zolciak, Kandi Burruss, Sheree Whitfield, Cynthia Bailey, and NeNe Leakes

One of the most ghettoest of the housewives series is “The Realhousewives of Atlanta”. Again, housewife means that you’re suppose to be an unemployed wife BUT that’s anything but on this series. Phaedra (wife) is a practicing lawyer, NeNe (wife) just became a entertainment reporter on tv, Sheree (ex-wife) attempted to get her own clothing line off the ground and is trying real hard to be an actress, Cynthia (fiancé) is a working high fashion model, Kim (mistress/baby momma) is a horrible singer but she’s out there making her own money when she’s not collecting money from random rich men, and Kandi (ex-fiancé) is a singer/song writer/producer/fashion store owner.

I know that I’m not the only who recognizes that Hollywood’s portrayal of a housewife just so happens to be totally ass backwards! This senseless drama is so High school. I mean seriously how old are all these ladies? They should be ashamed of themselves. Audiences are overly exposed to big tits, botox injections, cosmetic surgery, alcohol, cat fights, water tossing, the word bitch, and very little motherhood. The one thing we don’t see is sex…shocking right? I guess that would make the show just a little to personal and the next new low for these reality show creators.

As to all you so called housewives (that are not married) and living the life of a kept women… kiss my ass! I really don’t sympathize with your struggle.

~Dana Da Designated Hata® aka Nobody’s Fan®

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So, being the social networking guru that I am, I decided to run a lil social experiment to see if we as a race really do get off on the unhappiness of others or am I (and others) just insensitive MF’s. What caused me to do this you may ask…? It all came down to being sick & tired of seeing people online complaining about not having that special someone in their life. Everyday I watched the same 15 people (yes, I have more than 15 friends on FB, but these are constant complainers) crying like someone kicked sand in their face about how they are single, they are lonely, they need someone in their life…and so on.

Now, I’ve been in a relationship for 11 years, most of them the happiest times of my life, and yes… not every relationship is this good (believe me, I know), but we work it out and being friend’s helps. Everyone that knows us knows that we are good for each other (I hope, lol), and our families get along for the most part. So I knew that this lil experiment would cause a stir and maybe provide the now “Broken Up Couple” some words of wisdom. Now, at first I didn’t even tell my baby cuz I wanted to see what they would say to my new found “Single” status… but once I saw the beginning posts on FB, I knew I had to spill the beans.

Now, I was single by choice for a long time before this relationship. I was never the “find that person in the club”, or the let my friends “hook me up on purpose” type person… In fact, I hated that and stopped hanging with those that thought it was their birthright to find me a mate. I am extremely picky and got standards so high it makes me sick sometimes, but whenever I found that person to spend time with… the meeting was a introduction but on some “this is my homie, a group of us are going to the movies… You wanna come” type vibe and we would just progress from there.

You see, I really do not understand the begging online for a mate mentality (esp. on FB, which is as bad or even worse than doing it on Myspace). Now, I come from the school of thought that begging gets you NO WHERE! No one wants a NEEDY person and esp. some needy MF’s begging on a social network for someone to love them. Post after post, these people ask why love is escaping them, why can’t their true love and devotion be returned, why doesn’t so & so love them anymore, why… You get the idea. But never do they ever say why the relationship has gone astray, or why they cant stay in one, or what their faults are, and why the other person just couldn’t put up with their shit anymore or longer than a few weeks. Yet they feel that if they reach out to their so-called “Friends” on FB or any other social network outside of the paid dating sites that these MF’s can’t afford or else they wouldn’t be messing up our timelines, that we will either offer some pity or someone will reach out with that quick fix (a hook up or a friend that is doing the same thing on THEIR page… smh). These post are always met with the “Don’t worry, someone will come your way” or “If it’s meant to be, they will come back to you”. That’s cuz we are all thinking the same sh*t…. “What tha Hell did you do to make them leave your sorry Ass”? Here is the bottom line, we as humans are curious by nature and we want to know facts (or the juicy bits that make sites like this and mediatakeout as must reads daily). You whining about being lonely just isn’t cutting it, cuz… WE DON’T CARE!!! This will not get you someone worth being with, cuz its built on pity and if this is your game just to get some ass… then you deserve to be alone, you stupid ass whiney bitch nigga. If someone doesn’t want to be with you… trust me, they have their reason. Maybe, just maybe… it’s because you are a whiney bitch nigga and the 3 year old temper tantrums was the final straw. Look within, cuz even when you say… “I am going to stop looking and if it’s meant to be it will”, your next post is back on your whiney bitch nigga plea for someone to love you.

Back to my lil test… so, 5 minutes after posting that I was single, the comments started… not your regular pity comments. I got real concern from people that know me and those that didn’t. The family started with their calls and the private messages got a lil crazy. Not asking for details, but letting me know that we could work it out no matter what, cuz we had real love. So as we sat back and scratched our heads, I decided to test it further, changed my status to some world is ending cuz they left me and the pills were out next to the henny and the burna was cocked and ready to make my head see thru, the more people were ready to chew us out for even thinking about leaving each other. Now, let me state that both of us are very private people and never post personal shit on these sites… NEVER!!! So I must admit that it was out of norm for us to do this, but get this… from the booty beggers, I got a “welcome to the club finally” and I even got a “they were too good for you anyway”… Mind you, this came from someone I NEVER met or spoke to… WTF?!?!?!?!?!

Now, I don’t give pity posts (and never will), I don’t do the motivational speeches that litter page upon page of FB comments, nor do I give false hope to those that bring it upon themselves… hell, I got more problems than to baby ya’ll wretched asses… thank you, but I find it interesting that these people don’t see that no one is really feeling sorry for them, we are just giving them a virtual pat on the head and saying “it will be ok little fella… now go take a nap or something”. Stop begging for ass online, it makes you look like a desperate, needy lil fuck that is going to mess with someone’s heart who is really looking for someone that is on their level and deserving of love. Man Up in a nutshell!!!

As for my social experiment, I guess the world knows my relationship is solid and isn’t really concerned as to what happened… just that we fix it and get back on track. Whew, cuz I would really hate to have to spazz on those that I thought were my REAL friends.

To those MF’s that are looking for real love by begging us for the meaning to your fucked up existence … sorry you got caught up in my lil rant, but maybe next time you go on FB or any other social network and express your undying need for a strong hug and a kind word… You will make sure that I am NOT your friend.

Soundtrack for this Article:
Looking For A New Love – Jody Watley (YouTubeLink)
I Want Your Love – Chic (YouTubeLink)
Real Love – The Doobie Brothers (YouTubeLink)
Chasing Pavements – Adele (YouTubeLink)
Real Love – Skyy (YouTubeLink)
If I Can’t Have You – Yvonne Elliman (YouTubeLink)

~Da Inner Child

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So Jeffree Star aka “Queen of the Internet” aka “Queen of the Beautifuls” may be an Internet star via MySpace, but he’s about to take his game to a new level now that he’s been scooped up by Akon and signed to Konvict Muzik. You’re probably wondering how Akon managed to hook up with the likes of Star since it’s a little “how you doin”. Especially since straight males stay as far away as they possibly can from cross dressing males, no matter how secure they are with their sexuality. BUT not Akon, he understands the power of the LBGT dollar and is willing to place his bet on the straight crowd too.

Sure Akon will never have to work another day in his life thanks to his lottery success with Lady GaGa… but that’s not stopping him from searching for another golden ticket. However, not even Akon can seem to fully describe his new artist when asked. He’s basically leaving it up to the audience to decide, and trust me once you see Jeffree in action you’ll finally be able to understand.

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Do you think he’s pretty? Is that the question that you’re asking yourself right now? OR are you strangely questioning Jeffree’s masculinity? I know that I couldn’t take my eyes off him and that his make-up is absolutely flawless…. “Beauty Killer” is right. Ru Paul ain’t got nothing on Jeffree Star, but I think he’s gonna seriously stir things up and people aren’t going to know what to do with themselves. He’ll have the power, finances, and resources of major label behind him… “Man Oh Man” Jeffree’s level of exposure is going to be ridiculous.

Konvict Music is going into uncharted territory with the LBGT community, and it spans much deeper and further than Lady GaGa could ever reach. Suddenly being “gay” is in, and I don’t think the straight male population will freely accept this movement for the sake of entertainment. However, I’m sure they’ll be shaking their ass to Star’s music in the clubs, and won’t acknowledge that they like it in the street.

I’m not sure if I’m strangely entertained, slightly confused, excited or scared…LOL. All I know is that I’m going to sit back with a big bag of popcorn and watch androgynous boy “To Wong Foo” it up… because trust me, we’re in for a strange ride that’s wilder than getting white girl wasted.

~Dana Da Designated Hata

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So Rapper Nas is pretty pissed off with Def Jam for not putting his shit out. Apparently the record company is doing what it does best… playing GOD with artists careers and dictating when and if an artist gets to shine. Even if you’ve sold millions of albums and they’ve made millions in revenue off of you.

Well Nas is no novice when it comes to the music game and the nine-time Grammy Award-nominee is tired of the bullshit. So much so that he gave the mucky mucks over at Def Jam a piece of his mind. Take a look at the letter he wrote…

From: Nas
To: LA Reid, Steve Bartels, Steve Gawley, Michael Seltzer, Joseph Borrino, Chris Hicks
Subject: PUT MY SHIT OUT!

Peace to all,

With all do respect to you all, Nas is NOBODY’s slave. This is not the 1800′s, respect me and I will respect you.

I won’t even tap dance around in an email, I will get right into it. People connect to the Artist @ the end of the day, they don’t connect with the executives. Honestly, nobody even cares what label puts out a great record, they care about who recorded it. Yet time and time again its the executives who always stand in the way of a creative artist’s dream and aspirations. You don’t help draw the truth from my deepest and most inner soul, you don’t even do a great job @ selling it. The #1 problem with DEF JAM is pretty simple and obvious, the executives think they are the stars. You aren’t…. not even close. As a matter of fact, you wish you were, but it didn’t work out so you took a desk job. To the consumer, I COME FIRST. Stop trying to deprive them! I have a fan base that dies for my music and a RAP label that doesn’t understand RAP. Pretty f*cked up situation

This isn’t the 90′s though. Beefing with record labels is so 15 years ago. @ this point I just need you all to be very clear where I stand and how I feel about “my label.” I could go on twitter or hot 97 tomorrow and get 100,000 protesters @ your building but I choose to walk my own path my own way because since day one I have been my own man. I did business with Tommy Mottola and Donnie Einer, two of the most psycho dudes this business ever created. I worked well with them for one major reason……. they believed in me. The didn’t give a f*ck about what any radio station or magazine said….those dudes had me.

Lost Tapes is a movement and a very important set up piece for my career as it stands. I started this over 5 years ago @ Columbia and nobody knew what it was or what it did but the label put it out as an LP and the fans went crazy for it and I single handlely built a new brand of rap albums. It’s smart and after 5 years it’s still a head of the game. This feels great and you not feeling what I’m feeling is disturbing. Don’t get in the way of my creativity. We are aligned with the stars here, this is a movement. There is a thing called KARMA that comes to haunt you when you tamper with the aligning stars. WE ARE GIVING THE PEOPLE EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT. Stop throwing dog sh*t on a MAGICAL moment.

You don’t get another Nas recording that doesn’t count against my deal….PERIOD! Keep your bullshPt $200,000.00 fund. Open the REAL budget. This is a New York pioneers ALBUM, there ain’t many of us. I am ready to drop in the 4th quarter. You don’t even have sh*t coming out! Stop being your own worst enemy. Let’s get money!

-N.Jones

I have to admit that Nas is spitting a lot of truth. I really could care less which label puts out which artist. To many damn labels to keep up with all that shit anyway. All that really matters to me is the quality of the product. No label gets extra props because of its catalog – that’s a corporate executive contest that the public/fans aren’t concerned about.

Now the average rapper would probably be absolutely horrified that this letter has been leaked, but Nas is anything but average and I’m sure that he ain’t even sweating it. He’s been known to voice is opinions whenever he’s been wronged, like when him and Jay-Z bumped heads at Hot 97′s Summer Jam in 2001. Nas wasn’t happy about it and went straight to the radio to air his grievances for everyone who wasn’t at Summer Jam to hear. *inserts devilish voice…CLASSIC*

You see the public isn’t suppose to know about what goes on behind closed doors, and now that Nasty Nas’ interoffice message has been leaked, Def Jam will be forced to acknowledge this issue because his fans are really watching and waiting now.

On another note… Def Jam needs to stop fucking with Nas’ paper, we all know that Kelis is collecting an arm and a leg for alimony and child support from him. Although he’s not crying broke, the point is for him to continue to generate additional income before everything that’s left in reserve is all gone. Nas is no dummy… well all except for when it came to who should be crowned as wifey… but the penis makes you stupid things sometimes and he’s paying for it now – literally.

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Wait, hold up… when did Mario tear a page out of Chris Brown’s book? He took it one step further and decided to beat on his Mother. Nah, not Mr. Let Me Love You.

The R&B singer and former “Dancing with the Stars” contestant Mario has been charged with assaulting his Mother at their Baltimore home on Friday, October 1, 2010.

What happened? Did she pull the “I’m your Mother and you’re going to do as I say” card? I have to wonder…SMH. We as children all have moments of rebellion when we’re simply too old to take idol threats from of our parents. However, no matter what, you should never raise your hand to them. Yell, certainly. Get angry and walk away, definitely. BUT things should never get to the point of having you arrested… NEVER! And this is not a conversation about self defense for those of you who want to argue circumstance, because that’s a horse of a different color.

Apparently things got a little to out of control at the home of Mario and his Moms, Shawntia Hardaway. She told the police that her 24-year-old son, Mario Barrett, had pushed her. SAY WORD. Mom’s dropped dime on her son who’s probably supporting her ass and her dirty little habit.

Now let’s not look over the fact that Shawntia Hardaway’s got a drug problem, and I’m not talking about marijuana. Her last know substance was the white devil known as heroin. Mario who obviously loves his mother and even participated in a 2007 MTV special, “I Won’t Love You to Death: The Story of Mario and His Mom,” tackled and dealt with his mother’s addiction.

Mario may have had an altercation because he’s just fed up with her ass. His moms may have been acting stupid – said or done the wrong thing – and before you know it BAM… things got out of control. Either way, someone called the authorities, and what could have been handled behind closed doors between family, is now going to be on display for the entire world. Mario was charged with second-degree assault and later released on $50,000 bond.

I guess we’ll just have to see what happens… you know you can’t trust a crackhead. So maybe after the dust clears, so will this situation. In the meantime Shawnita better find some other way to make ends meet because if Mario is smart… he would’ve cut her off financially by now for having his ass arrested.

Screw me… nah… screw you.

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How many people can actually say that they get the opportunity to hang with the fabulous Ms. KiKi Shepard from “It’s Showtime at the Apollo”? Well I can damn it!!! However, this time it was for a purpose. KiKi Shepard is actually the CEO/Founder of The K.I.S. Foundation, Inc. which a non-profit organization that helps raise awareness for Sickle Cell Disease.

For the past seven years KiKi has been hosting one of the best Celebrity Bowling Tournaments that I’ve ever been to, and it just keeps getting better. This year I decided to play a more active role and support her efforts in the fight against Sickle Cell Disease. Not only was Team Hate in the building… BUT I also hooked up the Volunteers with some special edition t-shirts.

Photo: Special Edition T-Shirts for KiKi Shepard’s Celebrity Bowling Challenge

On September 17, 2010 in Studio City, California the Red Carpet was on fire with celebrity after celebrity after celebrity… but things really heated up when KiKi arrived. I guess it’s to be expected. I mean she’s like late night Hip-Hop, Rap, & R&B royalty right there…LOL

Photo: Glen Turman, Dawnn Lewis (KISF Board Member), KiKi Shepard and Arjay Smith / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

Photo: KiKi Shepard and The NBA Wives Association / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

Photo: Wayne Brady and his daughter / Photo Credit: The NextPhase Ent.

Black Hollywood came out to support the mission of The K.I.S. Foundation by raising their voices and using their celebrity together with sponsors such as Herbalife, James Pickens Jr. & Chandra Wilson (Grey’s Anatomy), the Sickle Cell Disease Foundation of Orange County, American Airlines, and yours truly Dana Da Designated Hata.

Photo: KiKi’s CBC Celebrity Group Shot / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

Photo: Dominique Elston, Glen Turman, Mari Morrow, Tracie Thoms, Dawnn Lewis, Chico Benymon, Page Kennedy, and Bob Minor / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

Photo: Sara Ramirez and LaTonia Robinson (KISF Dir of Operations) / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

The top four male and four female celebrities went head to head during a Lightning Round for the ultimate Celebrity Bowling Challenge. Bob Minor (Actor/Stuntman) and Tracie Thoms (Actress, Cold Case) walked away with the celebrity prize. They were definitely on their A-game and throwing some heat.

Photo: Tracie Thoms “1st Place Celebrity Winner” & Quinton Aaron / Photo Credit: Vinny Ratcliff

Picture: Jackee Harry and Ladi G / Photo Credit: NextPhase Ent.

Sadly Team Hate lost… Art Evans (Actor), David Macklin (NFL player), Ladi G (Femcee), and Gerri Battista were no match for the competition, BUT I’ll gladly take the L because it was for a good cause. Everyone had fun and new bonds were formed. So ultimately Team Hate expands and my diabolical plan has worked *ques evil genius laugh*. Shouts out to DJ Tommy Blak who got tied up by a mob of midgets and monkeys that forced him to dance the hula and throw back some chicken wings… you’re the reason why we lost… LOL, just kidding.

As for all you Hollywood folks (in and out of the business) that show up to charity fundraisers FOR FREE just so that you can be seen, network, and/or get your picture taken — but are to cheap to make a contribution in any amount — should be absolutely ashamed of yourselves!!! You want people to believe that you’re there for the greater good, BUT the truth of the matter is that you’re straight frontin. Don’t stand there an drop names about who you’re working with on you next project just so that you can attempt to get in for free, like you’re big time, and then can’t even dig in your wallet to make a contribution. A party is a party BUT if you’re going to go out to a charity event to hob nob with “the who’s who” then you need to make a donation!! Learn to help out those who are helping others.

Kudos to KiKi for an amazing event, and if you want to learn more about The K.I.S. Foundation please visit www.TheKISFoundation.org

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